Last night, after dancing with a budding Rockstar, she and I had a chance to chat for a bit. After a few minutes, she asked me who my favorite follows were, and — since I had already noted how much I was impressed with and liked her dancing — I understandably mentioned the names of some other follows. In response, she noted who her favorite leads were (several of them I’m friends with) and why.
At the time, I didn’t really think much of this, but then it sunk in, and now I view the conversation with both detached bemusement and slight awkwardness.
I’m clearly not anywhere near the Rockstar league in my dancing, nor do I think I’ll ever reach that level of ability and status. This has been the cause of occasional consternation for me, admittedly, but that’s actually a different issue.
Instead, I see our conversation last night slightly akin to former lovers talking about and ranking the porn stars they’ve slept with.
“Well, it just feels really smooth with Jake… he handles me perfectly… assertively without being rough.”
“I just lose myself in Carl. He’s so playful, yet sensual…”
…and I’m thinking, whoa, I have a small, er, um, a performance problem of sorts.
It’s petty for me to even think this way, I acknowledge. But nonetheless, it still feels a bit weird dancing with someone and yet knowing you’ll never measure up to their other partners, past, present and future.
In some ways, all of this could be used as a learning tool, I suppose. I’ll go stalk Jake and Carl, coerce them into giving me tips or free mini-lessons, and/or maybe just hope to absorb some of their mad skillz by osmosis. Coincidentally, earlier that night, I already danced (followed) with Carl, and dammit if he AIN’T a dreamy lead!
Well, it’s worth a try, isn’t it? 😀