Lipless lesbians (there’s Something About Mary!)

politics, society

Living in San Francisco and having gay and lesbian friends, you’d think that I’d be pretty savvy about this demographic. But this week, I learned something fascinating:

Some lesbians have no lips.

You think I’m crazy, eh? But how else can we explain the freaky fact that — with all the brouhaha over comments about Mary Cheney — we’ve not heard a single peep from… Mary Cheney.

This, folks, is not a cringing wallflower. She’s been openly lesbian for more than a decade, and she’s been campaigning actively for her dad and his assistant, er, co-president, whatever-you-wanna-call-him. As most folks with a pulse and an IQ higher than the diameter of Bush’s bulge know, her dad’s even spoken of his daughter’s sexuality at various public functions… apparently without shame or indignation from Mary or anyone else.

So why hasn’t Mary opened up her mouth? Why hasn’t she blurted out “Kerry, you’re a jerk-off” or “Mom, Dad, would you just shut up already, I can speak for myself, thank-you-very-much.”

From henceforth, then, I’ll call her (and those like her) a “Lipless Lesbian.” A perfect counterpart to unapologetic Republican homosexuals, whom I’ll dub “Guileless Gays.”

And if she’s got a problem with that, well, she can act like an adult and let me know herself.

4 comments… add one
  • Len Brown Oct 15, 2004 Link Reply

    Quite right.  As indicated in my own blog, rather than help them smear Kerry, all the Gay-Bashing Cheney’s have smeared is their daughters nose in their own hypocracy.

  • cleo Feb 26, 2008 Link Reply

    u r as sexy as a dildo

  • salope May 20, 2008 Link Reply

    That’s right, also in France, Paris or Nice, we also have a population of lesbian and I would even say pornhub.

  • Lesbianfilms Dec 12, 2009 Link Reply

    Or perhaps she is keeping a dignified silence. Not everyone feels the need to blab things all over the television

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