Hollywood director wants butts extinguished

My hands are bloody; so are Hollywood’s. My cancer has caused me to attempt to cleanse mine. I don’t wish my fate upon anyone in Hollywood, but I beg that Hollywood stop imposing it upon millions of others. – famous Hollywood director Joe Eszterhas, in a New York Times editorial (free registration required to read… Continue reading Hollywood director wants butts extinguished

Working dumb vs. working smart then getting the hell out of the office

So far in my job searching, I’ve found that corporate Web sites often provide more amusement or frustration than enlightenment.  E-mail addresses that deliver text into black holes, submission forms that don’t submit, and — my favorite — Web sites that don’t even list a company’s actual physical mailing address.  Are they in Berkeley or Boise?  Who knows!… Continue reading Working dumb vs. working smart then getting the hell out of the office

Dear Aussie: Shrimps on the barbie, but no (visible) alligator juice

I’ve traveled all over Europe and even lived in Germany for a year, and I’m embarrassed about my lack of observation on one particular issue: Are people in Europe legally allowed to bring alcoholic beverages into public parks and beaches and the like?I seem to recall that the answer is yes, and indeed, I know… Continue reading Dear Aussie: Shrimps on the barbie, but no (visible) alligator juice

New evidence that the RIAA *IS* Evil

Okay, so those reading my headline here may snicker and exclaim, gee, that’s a really rough target. Next thing you’ll be asserting, Adam, is that San Francisco housing is expensive (whoa!) and McDonald’s stuff is unhealthy (but it’s 100% beef!) and Britney Spears lacks sophisticated vocal talent (she sings?). But wait, hear me out… there’s… Continue reading New evidence that the RIAA *IS* Evil

The Rich get Richer and the poor get… no more damn Scooby snacks!

scooby snacks

One of these initiatives will include discontinuing the snacks and refreshments historically provided by Prodigy. I know you all understand that drastic times calls for drastic measures and will support this initiative.”– from a leaked internal memo I don’t know how much the CEO of Prodigy makes, but my guess is it’s in the millions… Continue reading The Rich get Richer and the poor get… no more damn Scooby snacks!

No Beating around the Bush

George W. Bush

“The Bush polls have to be outrageously misleading. Someone suggested that most people called by pollsters simply hang up on them and wondered if there was a way to gauge their political views! I don’t know about that, but I can’t remember the last time I met anyone who can even stand the guy. Maybe… Continue reading No Beating around the Bush

Nice guys? Yeah, right.

[I wrote this tongue-in-cheek column for Simon and Schuster’s College Online section on AOL back in 1996. Not terribly groundbreaking stuff, but at least mildly entertaining and worth saving at least somewhere for posterity 😀 — Adam] Okay, Mr. and Miss Nice Persons, time to face the facts. You’re in short supply, yet low demand.… Continue reading Nice guys? Yeah, right.