adamyntium

Category: food and nutrition

  • Adam’s Spicy Strawberries recipe

    WARNING: This recipe is “Grandma style”… e.g., a little bit of this, a little bit of that, because I didn’t actually bother measuring anything 😮

    And one other warning: these are a bit messy to prepare (given the different powders) and also to eat (the powder gets all over your fingers), so toothpicks or forks are recommended 🙂

    TIME TO PREPARE
    About 15 minutes for 2 pounds of strawberries

    INGREDIENTS, most of them optional

    • Strawberries (duh!); should be fresh & not frozen
    • Sweeteners (I used brown sugar and powdered allulose)
    • Pinch of salt (important: must be fine-grained!)
    • Vanilla extract
    • Unsweetened cocoa powder
    • Cinnamon
    • Red pepper flakes (like the kind you put on pizza)

    STEPS

    1) Wash and cut the tops off strawberries

    2) Let them dry on a wire rack for a few minutes (easier than wiping the water off with a paper towel)

    3) After that, transfer them face-down to a parchment-paper-covered baking sheet or any other long-flat surface.

    4) Squeeze 2-3 drops of vanilla extract on each strawberry

    5) Separately in a bowl add brown sugar, cinnamon, red pepper flakes, unsweetened cocoa powder, finely-powdered allulose* and a small pinch of salt and mix well

    6) Coat the strawberries with the mixture. It may be easier to do this by pinching the powder and dumping on each strawberry vs. dunking each strawberry in the mixture to avoid making the mixture wet & clumpy.

    7) Enjoy!

    And of course, as you probably guessed, you can be very flexible with those ingredients! The main important parts are to balance the sweetness with a bit of bitterness (cocoa) and spiciness (probably any kind of pepper!).

    * Allulose is a naturally occurring sugar found at low levels in figs, raisins, wheat, maple syrup and molasses and has 90% fewer calories than regular sugar and potentially positive gut benefits. However, it’s not easy to find locally (I bought it on Amazon) and can be expensive, so you can absolutely substitute just more brown sugar or any kind of (ideally finely powdered) sugar.

  • Adam’s Hibcitrus Refresher

    Adam’s Hibcitrus Refresher

    a home-made non-alcoholic drink made with…

    • Hibiscus tea (dried hibiscus flowers steeped overnight in water)
    • Orange juice
    • Touch of honey (less than 1/4th teaspoon per serving!)
    • Squeeze of lime (about 1/16th of a lime per serving)
    • Dried red pepper flakes (like the kind you put on pizza)
    • Small amount of black pepper
    • Tiny pinch of salt
    • Lots of love!

    Enjoy!

    – Adam

  • Salmon: Super delicious & super-easy even for cooking n00bs! (#2 in “Cooking for the Lazy” series)

    Salmon: Super delicious & super-easy even for cooking n00bs! (#2 in “Cooking for the Lazy” series)

    Tonight I ate some of the most delicious salmon EVER… and, just as gratifying, I made it!

    Total prep & cook time: under 10 minutes (seriously).  Total cost: Under $10.

    Here are before and after pics:

    Salmon, pre-cooked, with rice & spices

    Ingredients:

    • Salmon (duh!)
    • Brown rice
    • Real butter (everything’s better with butter!)
    • Spices (I used garlic salt, pepper, and red curry paste)
    Salmon, cooked, next to brown rice and red curry paste

    Things I used to cook this stuff:

    • Skillet (with lid)
    • Spatula (for spreading the butter)
    • Tongs (though unsuccessfully; see later note)
    • Measuring cup (to measure rice and water)
    • Bowl (to microwave the rice in)
    • Paper towels for blotting salmon & cleaning up splatter :\

    Preparation steps:

    1. Cook rice. I used a microwavable quick-cook brown rice.  1 cup rice, 1 cup water = 2 servings. Throw the bowl in the microwave for 7 minutes, and it’s done by the time your salmon is ready!
    2. Blot salmon with paper towels.  Apparently, less-wet pre-cooked salmon = tastier cooked salmon.
    3. Pre-heat skillet on medium heat for a few minutes.
    4. Throw in a bunch of butter.  Spread it around with the spatula.
    5. Carefully place salmon in the skillet, skin side down.  Yes, cook with the skin, even if you’re one of those weirdos who will later avoid eating it.  It’s important for cooking the salmon nicely.
    6. Optionally add ground pepper, garlic salt, salt, whatever you feel like.
    7. Turn heat to medium-high.  Cover.  Cook for about 4 minutes (though I guess it depends on the size of your salmon piece).
    8. CAREFULLY flip salmon over.  This is the part, unfortunately, that I did not succeed with.  I got hot blackened salmon-skin+butter splatter all over the place. Bummer :(.  Let me know if you figure out a way to do this.  I tried tong’ing the salmon, but that didn’t seem to work very well.  Maybe I needed bigger tongs.
    9. Cook this side of the salmon for just 1-2 minutes.  Honest!  Unless you like tough yucky salmon. Personally, I prefer pink’ish, melt-in-your-mouth salmon.

    And melt-in-your-mouth amazing salmon is exactly what I ended up with!  Wow wow wow.

    I scooped some rice on the side of my plate, mixed in some red curry paste (a little goes a long way), and I was in heaven, eating the entire two servings worth of salmon and about half the rice in one sitting.

    Again, this took less than 10 minutes total to prepare.  And with the fresh salmon costing about $8/pound (and my piece weighing about three-quarters of a pound), plus negligible spice/condiment costs… it cost easily less than a third of what it would have in a restaurant.  Plus… this tasted better than almost every restaurant salmon dish I’ve had, since for some inexplicable reason restaurants seem apt to overcook their fish :\ (maybe due to cover-their-posterior health concerns?)

    Anyway, you owe it to yourself to try my recipe.  If you don’t have real butter, use oil.  If you don’t have red curry paste, use mustard or soy sauce or whatever.  But definitely do try cooking it the way I’ve described, and I am confident you’ll be as happy as I am right now 🙂

  • Waffanas (#1 in Adam’s “Cooking for the Lazy” series)

    Waffanas (#1 in Adam’s “Cooking for the Lazy” series)

    tl;dr:  Want to save time and scrolling? Pour waffle mix. Throw sliced bananas on it. Wait ’til cooked. Eat. YUM!

    Today I made waffanas, my brilliant name for banana-stuffed waffles.  They were super delicious and very easy to make, even for cooking-incompetent and kitchen-lazy people (like me and, perhaps, you).

    NOTE:  I’m linking to Amazon products below* for your informational convenience, but if you’re gonna buy any of this stuff, I strongly encourage you to shop around. Much of it may be quite a bit cheaper at your local grocery store, or on Jet or Google Shopping Express.

    PREP TIME:  About 4-6 minutes of actual work, plus another 5-7 minutes of waiting for the waffle iron to heat up and cook your waffanas :).

    The basics for making waffanas!
    The basics for making waffanas! Note that, while multiple bananas are pictured here, I only used one big banana for the four waffanas and that ratio seemed about right 🙂
    Almost but not quite perfect
    Almost but not quite perfect! Next time I’ll add a bit more mix so the bananas are better coated… avoiding some, uh, over-crispiness.

    THINGS YOU’LL NEED:

    • Waffle iron:  I love my Cuisinart WAF-300 Belgian Waffle Maker with Pancake Plates, in large part because it has removable (dishwasher-safe) plates.  But I’m betting nearly any waffle maker would do.  Or, for that matter, you could make pancakanas on any griddle or frying pan! 🙂
    • Waffle/pancake mix:  Who has time to make this stuff from scratch?  I am smitten with the Kodiak-brand mixes because they’re high in protein, have very natural ingredients, contain little sugar, and — unlike most mixes which require oil and eggs and such — you only have to add water to the Kodiak mixes!  But again, you can surely use any mix you like or have handy.  The Kodiak mixes should cost you around $5-6 a box, each of which allegedly contain 18 (!) servings but which is probably around 12 servings for us hungry Americans :).  Still, that’s like 50 cents a serving at most.
    • Oil to ensure non-stick’ness:  I use these spray bottles and they work great, but I’m betting you could find cheaper ones that work just as well.  Or heck, just put a bit of oil on a paper towel and rub it over your waffle iron or griddle.
    • Bananas:  Duh!  Any ripeness (or lack thereof) is totally a matter of your own preference here.
    • Other optional goodies:  Chocolate chips.  Chocolate sauce.  Chocolate spread (sensing a trend here?).  Berries (frozen or fresh).  Syrup.  Me?  I went with some drizzled honey 🙂


    HOW TO COOK WAFFANAS

    • Pre-heat:  Turn on the waffle iron or griddle.  Optionally rub or spray some oil on it first to make cleaning easier.
    • Slice the bananas:  Pretty self-explanatory.
    • Mix the mix:  I love this measuring cup ’cause you can see the numbers from the top.  But heck, you don’t even really have to measure this very exactly, so probably any cup’ll do.  A whisk is helpful, but probably not necessary.
    • Pour stuff:  When your waffle iron or griddle is hot enough, pour in the mix!  And then just sort of throw the sliced bananas on top, pretending to space them evenly throughout the waffle iron or whatever, but hey, no need to get all precise with this.  They’ll get all smunched into the mix anyway in a moment.
    • Close the top tightly:  Assuming you’re waffling and not pancaking, you’ll want to close the lid pretty tight so that the bananas indeed get appropriately smunched into the waffle mix.


    TIME TO EAT!
    You can optionally drizzle honey or chocolate or syrup over the waffanas or throw whatever toppings you like on top.  But remember that you’ve already got some sweetness from the bananas (especially if they were on the ripe side), so don’t go overboard.  Unless you’re intending to make dessert waffanas, in which case, hey, knock yourself out, sweetie!


    TRY WAFFANING AND LET ME KNOW HOW IT GOES!
    This is my first in a series of absolutely indeterminate frequency and length, called “Cooking for the Lazy.”  If you really like it (and let me know) AND if I end up making other tasty things with my new’ish waffle maker and smoothie maker / blender thingy, then I’ll consider posting more episodes.  For now, though, I’m off to eat some of the waffanas I made earlier.  Let’s see how they are in the toaster or microwave!

    EDITED TO ADD:  I can now confirm that they are still amazingly delicious when toasted :-).

    IDEAS FOR NEXT TIME:  I think I will try adding shredded coconut.  Or peanut butter.  Or hazelnut-chocolate paste!

    —

    *And now for a disclaimer and more pretty images:  My Amazon links are affiliate ones, so that maybe I’ll get 30 cents here and there and treat myself to more food.  Oh, who am I kidding?  I’m gonna buy booze for the smoothies.  Don’t judge.  Or judge, I don’t care :-).

  • A toast to home breadmaking

    [See disclaimer at the bottom]

    I had set my clock for 8:30 this Sunday morning.  That, my dear readerly friends, was indeed a bit audacious.  But what came next was completely unexpected:
    – I smelled bread.  Wonderful, warm, fresh bread.
    – No, I wasn’t still dreaming!

    …and then the amazing part:  I got out of bed, without actually hitting the snooze button multiple times!  I think that’s a first in years.

    You see, I had had the good foresight to prepare bread for my breadmaker the night before, and set the timer to have the bread all finished by 8:34am this morning.  I made it downstairs just in time for the bread to finish, and then I prepared myself a wonderful breakfast of Toast ‘n’ Jelly Pepper eggs!  This is from a delicious recipe I learned from my mom:

    • Toast with jam (the good kind that’s 100% fruit, not the Smuckers high fructose corn sweetened crap! I love the St. Dalfour brand of conserves!) and butter
    • A sunnyside-up egg on top [can’t buy those on amazon, sadly!]
    • Fresh ground pepper to taste

    Yum!

    The bread was from this Hodgson Mill 9 Grain bread mix:

    • Upsides: very delicious, rises reliably, good texture (just the right amount of crunch and density), and quite inexpensive! 
    • Downsides: not 100% whole wheat, not very high in fiber, pretty high in calories.
    And the toaster (“Back to Basics TEM4500 4-Slot Egg-and-Muffin Toaster”)?  Whoa, crazy!  It does toast and eggs at the same time!  Just bought it, and this was my first time trying it.  Pretty nifty!
    Back to Basics TEM4500 4-Slot Egg-and-Muffin Toaster
    • Upsides:  Cool to the touch, seems to toast/cook very reliably, it times toast+eggs well, and you can even hardboil eggs with it!
    • Downsides:  This thing is pretty hefty-sized (though no more than is reasonable for the food capacity), the egg cooker thingies aren’t no-stick (even with a dusting of canola oil, I had to use a spatula to get the egg out). And for a single guy (with one roommate), did I really need to buy the larger version (they have a smaller version that toasts two slices of bread and cooks one egg concurrently)?
    Still, despite what seems like more disadvantages than advantages, I’m glad I bought this.  The toast + egg this morning were delicious! 🙂  And at <$2/box for the bread, I could make a whole loaf per day cheaper than a single cup of Starbucks coffee!  Which reminds me of a hint:  When shopping at Amazon, if you see a “subscribe and save” option, subscribe!  Even if you don’t want to get a subsequent shipment of the item, you can save 15% on the purchase and then cancel the subscription with just a couple of clicks at any time.  
    Alas, I can’t link you to the specific breadmaker that I use and love, because, well, not only has the model been discontinued, but apparently Regal (the company) doesn’t make breadmakers at all anymore.  But here’s a list of best-selling breadmakers that could be helpful for you.
    Oh, and I went full-out and bought yet more bread’y things from Amazon this past week:
    • A Rada Cutlery large bread knife.  Cuts like butta! :p
    • A Progressive International Adjustable Bread Keeper (aka, a breadbox!).  And yes, I am bigger than it!
    • And — though I admit this doesn’t really count as bread’y — it did go well with the toast:   Medaglia D’ Oro Instant Espresso Coffee.  Not as delicious as I hoped in water, but it does make for a great (and very inexpensive) iced coffee.  Take cold milk, stir in some of this stuff, add a touch of sugar or flavored syrup, and WOW.  We’re talking major energy, and pretty decent taste to boot.  Certainly much cheaper than the 5-Hour Energy Extra Strength Berry bottles that I bought previously (but they also do the trick energy-wise, and are admittedly more portable/convenient)
    *  *  *
    DISCLAIMER:  I had originally intended this post to highlight the waking and gustatory wonders of bread-making, my new neato toaster, and so on.  But ended up adding lots of amazon.com links, all of which earn me massive amounts of money (like 75 cents or so on sales of the bread knife, for instance).  So I felt a disclaimer was in order.  And hmm, now that I’ve already disclaimed, I’ll go ahead and add even more obnoxious links below, for your handy purchasing pleasure :p
        

  • Knott’s Berry Farm — For shame!

    Okay, this is not a rant on junk food.  I think when people eat Cheez-wiz, they aren’t misguided enough to assume they’re eating healthful real cheese.  When people eat a double fudge brownie, I doubt they’re confusing this with an apple.  And when people eat Cap’n Crunch cereal, there’s no way they’d assume they’re consuming real fruit.  Oh, um, wait a minute, someone did?  Er, well, anyway, you get my point 😀

    But seriously… sometimes there’s an absolute nasty & unhealthy food paired with such obnoxiously, blatantly misleading marketing that I can’t help calling a spade a hyrogenated [sic] artificially flavored spade.

    First, the marketing that, by all means, should condemn some marketer to eternal dietary hell:

    “In 1920, Walter and Cordelia Knott began selling fresh produce, berries, and preserves from a roadside berry stand in Buena Park, California.  Their family business earned a place in history in 1932 when Walter Knott cultivated a lucious new fruit, the boysenberry.  The farm that started it all has also become a family amusement park that delights millions. 

    The Knott family is pleased to extend their tradition of quality to include premium shortbread cookies.  Richly flavorful, these classic favorites are prepared using popular Knott’s Berry farm fruit fillings.”

    Let’s dissect this, shall we?

    > In 1920, Walter and Cordelia Knott began selling fresh produce, berries, and preserves from a roadside berry stand in Buena Park, California.
    …and boy, would they be horrified to see how their heirs have sold them out!

    > …when Walter Knott cultivated a lucious new fruit, the boysenberry.
    …which you’ll find all of likely one-tenth of a gram of in this plasticfood monstrosity.

    > … premium shortbread cookies
    … where “premium” means “premium profits for us, utter crap for you.”

    > … Richly flavorful
    … from lots of high fructose corn syrup

    > … these classic favorites
    … if you call a frankenstein concoction of chemicals “classic.”  Maybe a classic case of deceit.

    > … using popular Knott’s Berry farm fruit fillings.
    … oh, wait, we meant popular dental fillings!

    *  *  *

    But enough pre-commentary.  Without further ado, let’s take a look at these charming ingredients, shall we? (and out of kindness, I’ll substitute normal text for the ALL CAPS printed)

    Enriched wheat flour [artificial vitamin enrichment crap omitted], margarine (liquid soybean oil, partially hyrogenated [sic] soybean oil, water, salt, whey, lecithin, mono and di-glycerides, sodium benzoate a preservative, artificial butter flavor, beta carotene and vitamin A palmitate), raspberry topping (high fructose corn syrup, red raspberries, apple powder, fruit pectin, citric acid, natural and artificial flavors, calcium chloride, FD&C red #40 and blue #1), sugar, eggs, baking soda, natural and artificial flavor, baking ammonium, and salt.

    Mmmm… delicious, no?  Just like Grandma would have made it… if she had access to a chemistry lab *and* passionately hated your guts.

    Oh, and lookie here, (unsurprisingly) almost no redeeming nutritive qualities at all… little fiber or protein, and a charming 3 grams of trans-fat (I didn’t even know there were many packaged goods that still had this stuff in ‘em nowadays!)

    For comparison, let’s take a look at a typical recipe for berry shortbread cookies:

    1 cup butter, softened
    2/3 cup sugar
    1/2 teaspoon almond extract
    2 cups all-purpose flour
    1/3 cup seedless raspberry jam
    GLAZE:
    1 cup confectioners’ sugar
    2 teaspoons water
    1/2 teaspoon almond extract

    (from AllRecipes.com)

    Notice a difference?  Yes!  You recognize and can likely pronounce the ingredients, and there are fewer than a dozen of them.

    *  *  *

    Look, as I said, I don’t have a problem with companies making utter junkfood.  I do, however, have a problem about them so blatantly misrepresenting their product.  Even an intelligent acquaintance of mine said (without any prompting from me) that she used to eat these cookies every day for lunch, figuring that they were relatively harmless.  Oops!

    P.S.—Might think twice before buying any of Knott’s Berry Farm jams or other products, eh?

  • EPIC DIET FAIL

    Yesterday, I bought “Wii Fit” (a balance board + training CD). I decided I was really committed to exercise more and eat right. Today, unfortunately, I missed breakfast due to a dentist appointment and came into work late.  I grabbed a pack of cashews… not too bad.

    And that’s when it happened.  Charles walked by my desk.

    “Cafe 150?” he suggested.
    “I just ate a bit ago, but thanks.  I’ll grab lunch later.”
    “Seared ahi tuna!” he added, temptingly.
    (Hmm, I thought to myself, that sounds pretty healthy).
    “And prime rib.  And buffalo wings!”
    Oh boy.  Maybe I’ll go and just eat the tuna.

    I did, but I didn’t.  What I did have was this:

    – Chef salad
    – Seared ahi tuna with wasabi crème fraiche
    – Prime rib with horseradish cream
    – Rice pilaf with almonds, onions, carrots, and peas
    – Steam spring veggies with butter and parsley
    – Saffron rice

    One of the chefs was walking by and kindly pointed out an intriguing big brown vat.  This, then, led me to

    – Chocolate-peanut-butter-milk

    Right next to it was the dessert table.  Being the disciplined guy that I am, I just grabbed one… to go, even.  Which resulted in my procurement of

    – Apricot Caramel bread pudding
    with blackberries, condensed milk, cinnamon, nutmeg, allspice; served with chocolate cream cheese

    *  *  *

    With some off-the-napkin calculations, I believe it would take approximately 42 hours of intensive aerobics with the Wii Fit to burn the calories I’ve just consumed.

    This, I think, could be classified as EPIC DIET FAIL :-\

  • Natural energy boosters guaranteed to kick your ass (in a good way)

    I guarantee* that the following all-natural AdamSpecial (“CafeKeek” in honor of my now-undoubtedly-horrified French friends) will put a pep in your step, will put the mmmmm in mooove, will take the ache out of awake…

    Required…
    1) Coffee beans + grinder (ideal) OR not-terribly-fine-ground coffee (okay) OR instant coffee (will do in a pinch; can ignore French press/strainer instructions)
    2) Milk (ideally non-fat, optionally low-fat) OR milk substitute that can be heated/drunk hot or warm
    3) French press OR extra container + a strainer
    4) Teaspoon
    5) and – unless you don’t like sweet stuff—one of the following Adam-named add-ins
    – “Plain Sweetie”:  Sugar—one to two teaspoons per cup of milk.
    – “Chocolate Jesus”:  Pure unsweetened cocoa powder and sugar (one teaspoon each per cup of milk) OR pre-sweetened chocolate syrup / cocoa powder (Nestle Quik does not count!)
    – “Cuckoo du mint”:  The Jesus ingredients above + three drops pure mint extract per cup of milk OR Trader Joe’s mint cocoa powder

    Instructions for making CafeKeek…
    1) Boil milk OR heat milk in microwave (ideally use a microwavable measuring cup or similar item for easy pouring)
    2a) Got a French press?  Put in the ground coffee but not other ingredients.
    2b) Using a strainer?  Add ground coffee to intermediate container (that you can easily pour from into your drinking cup)
    3) Pour hot milk into either French press or intermediate container.  Wait 5 minutes.
    4) Pour coffee-soaked hot milk into drinking container (using strainer if you didn’t use a French press)
    5) Add optional other ingredients and stir with teaspoon.
    6) Enjoy, then come back here and write a comment about how much you loved it and how you’re eternally grateful to me and so on.
    7) Repeat, but probably not on the same day.

    Strongly recommended in conjuction with CafeKeek…
    – Protein—either a handful of nuts or some peanut butter on a cracker, etc.
    – Potassium—a banana works great (half of one is fine)
    – Exercise—no time for a real workout?  Prefix the incomparable CafeKeek with 18 jumping jacks or 18 seconds of jump-roping or anything else to quickly get your heart pumping.  I’m serious about this… it really helps!

    *  *  *

    Okay, now it’s your turn.  What natural foods / practices do you use to help wake you up? (so, yeah, those energy drinks with unpronounceable ingredients don’t qualify here)

    *Guaranteed satisfaction, or your pro-rated BLADAM subscription fees reimbursed!

  • Self improvement — how do you measure your progress?

    A few years back, I had some free sessions with a personal trainer at my gym, and one of the most useful takeaways was this:

    Unless you write stuff down, it’s too easy to “fudge the facts” in your mind.  How much pushups are you doing with good form?  What are you eating each day?  We tend to maximize the former, minimize the latter, and that’s not good.

    For starters, he made me write down each day *everything* I ate and drank, along with estimated calories associated with each thing I put in my mouth.  Boy, that was a depressing but enlightening shocker!

    Well, I decided to go one better and start my own personal health chart (in Excel), daily noting my progress on several fronts (weight, body fat percentage, pushups, etc.).  Alas, after a few months, that kinda fell by the wayside, so I picked it up again a year later.  And, once again, that only lasted a few months. 

    I’m trying yet again, and—now that I have the regular routine of a full-time job—I’m hoping it’ll somehow be easier to keep up the list.  For the very curious, I’ve included below exactly what I’m measuring:

    – E-mails still in my inbox
    – Body weight
    – Body fat percentage
    – Pushups (#)
    – Various medicines (e.g., remembering to use Nasalcrom, an allergy medicine)
    – Meditation (in minutes)
    – Stretching (yes/no)
    – Aerobic exercise (minutes)
    – Strength training (minutes)
    – Mood (1-10, 1 being suicidal, 10 being euphoric)
    – Mood jot (my mood in a few words… e.g. “Overwhelmed and frustrated” or “Optimistic and excited”)
    – Sleep (time I went to bed, time I got up, total hours of estimated actual sleep)
    – Notes (what I accomplished that day, major challenges facing me, etc.)

    *  *  *

    In looking over my previous efforts, I’ve noticed the following:
    – My weight seems to increase the day or two after working out.
    – Eating massive huge fatty meals seems to reduce my weight in the short term (!?)
    – I tend to be overwhelmed/stressed more than I thought I was.
    – My sleep patterns are more erratic and less healthy than I assumed.
    – Surprisingly, there doesn’t seem to be a strong correlation between getting lots of sleep and feeling less tired the next day. 
    – After gaining nearly 10 pounds at Google and then losing those same 10 pounds, I’m now about where I was weightwise a year or two ago (still about 15 pounds to go!)

    *  *  *

    Have you kept your own “metrics journal”?  What are some of the things you have measured?  Observations?  And did such a journal help you reach goals?

  • A comparison of dark chocolates from Trader Joe’s

    Methodology
    I took a bite of the famed whole-wheat Ak-Mak cracker and sips of orange juice in between chocolate nibbles.

    Goal
    Vital learning in the name of science, with an aim to provide thoughtful, unbiased info to my fellow dark chocolate lovers.

    Grand summary
    – Villars – Swiss chocolate:  Sharpest (along with Trader Joes)
    – Valrhona – French chocolate:  creamest, sweetest, with a noticeable but mild afterbite, fruity
    – Guaranda – Equadorian chocolate (strangely labeled “European chocolate”):  smokey
    – Trader Joe’s Pound Plus (“TJ”) – Belgian chocolate:  thickest of all, tied for sharpest with Villars, faintly fruity, hardest, least creamy initially

    Relevant notes

    • All the chocolate bars boasted a chocolate percentage ranging from 70-72%, and contained the following ingredients:  Cocoa mass, sugar, cocoa butter, and soy lecithin (as an emulsifier).  Additionally, the Villars contained “flavours” and the Valrhona was “flavored with natural vanilla.”
    • I conducted three ‘rounds’ of testing.  In one of the rounds, I simply ate a small piece of chocolate from each bar one after another.  In the other two rounds (with differing sampling orders), I ate a piece of Ak-Mak wheat cracker and sipped some orange juice in between chocolate pieces to cleanse my palate.

    My observations

    • Since the TJ was at least twice as thick as the others, it was hard to compare the mouth-feel.  Since, for instance, thinner chocolate will naturally melt more quickly in the mouth, this significantly alters the perception of creaminess.
    • Sampling 12 small pieces of chocolate wasn’t as enjoyable as I imagined.  I felt somewhat unpleasantly full, even after eating less than one bar total.  Note that the testing was done after a sizeable lunch, however.
    • The Villars and TJ tied for sharpest / most-bitter… but not unpleasantly bitter.  All the chocolates, at least by my tastes, were amply sweet.
    • The Valrhona was the creamiest and sweetest, perhaps due to the added vanilla.
    • The Valrhona and, to a slightly lesser extent, the TJ had a mildly fruity aftertaste.  Though Scharffenberger chocolate was not included in this test round, I distinctly remember that particular brand having a comparatively much more powerful—almost overpowering—fruitiness to it.
    • The Guaranda had the most unique flavor, both initially and lingering.  The wrapper describes it as “…exotic wood nuances”… but, before reading this, the first word that came to my mind was “smokey.”  Not in a bad way, and it was very subtle, but still noticeable.  This wasn’t surprising to me, since I had eaten roasted (unsweetened) cacao beans… and they do taste woodsy/smokey to me.

    *  *  *

    The bottom line

    All of these chocolates are delicious, and—sans the “Pound Plus” TJ wrapper—I’d be proud to serve any of them to guests.  I do wish the TJ was less thick (sliced horizontally down the middle in the pack would be perfect!), but overall, it’s an extremely good buy given the price! (around $4.50 as of August, 2006).  In particular, I’ve found that combining a handful of mixed nuts with a single thick piece of the TJ chocolate makes for a wonderfully delicious snack… and—given the mix of fats, proteins and antioxidants—a rather filling and healthy one, too, in moderation.

    For pure sampling / eating right out of the wrapper, I’d probably go with one of the non-TJ chocolates, but couldn’t state a preference amongst them at present.

    *  *  *

    Hope this has been helpful, or at least blissfully insightful.  Any other chocolate lovers out there?  😀